Loosing hold .....

Since last so many days.. things are just out of my way...!!! never thought tht my last year will be soo furious and full of thrills that one would never like...!!  m just loosing control over my mind and loosing hold on every action of mine . m becoming a big store house of various feelings that i use to just let go. But now when its required for me to curb , its absolutely not letting me let myself free and natural.

A terror stucks my mind over and over again...that its not ‘REAL ME’. But ya i know one thing that alwys holds true  is ‘heading higher is marked by difficulties and stuff tht surely is against ur will’....

There is a wrong thought that should be changed ryt this moment....  ‘my real aim for this write up’  tht curbing my wrong doings into good ones.. even if its going against ur natural being is not restricting ur freedom.. y m i mingling freedom wth self control.. it shouldn’t be done but its happening to me and proves to be a big hindrance on my WAY...!!! n i m just here...again.... spoiling my seconds ...my moments.. that could hv been spent in the best possible comportment.... i turn weak every next second telling myself ... “ why should i “ soo wrong.. even after being wth two guiding lights fr three years..!!

It happened to me two days before only .....that i told myself to go crazy fr extracting happiness .....but m not...m not doing the same ....but y not....!!!!!

 i will change.. i will curb..i will pass.. i CAN curb.. i WILL curb...got to burn urself  ‘dear’ ..n this is ‘this’ burning that is  pinching you baby ..!!! i was just ending up but this last statement is giving me some lovely ...beautiful...strong... strength....!!!!  

so yeah its again... ME wrapping up ... i would again end up sayin as i always do .. i‘l work over it to my best....and I know I will turn out pure... wth His grace who makes me realise.. and gives me strength ..JJJJJ

shubuuuu.... <3 <3